April’s arrived and flowers are blooming

 Yep the year marches on, we have got our second Covid jab booed for the 14th. And Easter looks like a cold flop. The weather is set to cold with even colder weather to come. The great news is we have loads of flowers showing themselves. Daffodils 🌼 of course but Heather took some photos of what look like fritillary and maybe some irises so stay tuned over the next week or so because as soon as the bloom they will be photographed by Heather. I can’t get into the garden as we have steps down the back of the house into the garden 🪴 and as of yet my electric wheelchair has not learned the art of getting me up or down stairs. We have a through floor lift to get me upstairs and I have to be hoisted in and out of bed. My multiple Sclerosis has left me unable to stand or walk. Still it’s one way of not doing the washing up 😂😂😂 

I have been on eBay and also on https://www.suttons.co.uk/ for the last week or so looking at plants 🪴 Heather is th gardener, I think on a previous post about Geraniums I described her as the brawn and me as the brains of our gardening efforts! Click here to read http://reflectingandmusing.blogspot.com/2020/06/wheelchair-gardening.html 

My enthusiasm is peaking to early this year, I have decided to hang fire for a few weeks and buy some garden ready specimens when the chance of frost has past. Plus we are waiting on 200 bulbs Heather planted to put in an appearance before anything else goes in the ground. Research 🧐 is key to gardening 🧑‍🌾 had I just gone ahead and bought one thing I liked the look of I would have been waiting until next year for it to 🌺 flower 🌸 . Right I am in bed writing this and it’s 11:59 pm so good night and and good morning all at the same time, I am signing off for now , here are some pictures of the garden.

Feeling depressed

 I have been a bit low for the last few days and then it dawned on us why. Last Friday we had to visit University College London Hospital to have the Baclofen pump refilled and the dose increased so maybe it’s my body getting used to the larger dose of Baclofen. Drugs have had some strange side effects over the years from hallucinations to insomnia so it’s no real surprise. I have Multiple Sclerosis and recently had an operation to form a stoma a colostomy. So far it has been a success we are just two months in and the nurse has told us to wait three months before getting too excited. 

My depression maybe the drug increase or just dealing with my MS. I cannot walk or even stand anymore so all the pressure goes on to my wife Heather. She is fantastic and deserves far better from life but carries on regardless dealing with everything and putting my well-being before her own. Depression just creeps up on you sneaking in through the cracks and going unnoticed until it has suddenly got it’s feet under the table and is wearing it’s slippers, relaxing and comfortable with it’s surrounding. Currently with COVID-19 restrictions life is super difficult plus it is winter and even if I could get out it’s always bloody raining.

Heather has her work cut out getting me dressed and out of bed. I have to be hoisted on a sling suspended from an electric ceiling hoist. Showers and bathroom visits are done on a commode shower chair which has a mind of its own as to the direction it will take, I am sure it is related to the the wonky supermarket trolleys 🛒 that are abandoned in car parks. I am in an electric wheelchair for getting around but at the moment the furthest I go is downstairs in my through floor lift to sit looking out of the window for birds visiting the garden.  We have several bird feeders an even on a dull damp day like today the birds keep me amused and I am never far from my camera 📷 . Photography gives me immense pleasure and is something I would recommend to anyone feeling depressed! Digital photography has made everyone a photographer. Phones have fantastic cameras and for anyone who wants to be a bit more serious about taking pictures the range of cameras available is enormous. I will blog more about cameras another day.

Today’s post is about depression and I imagine that we all have off days, feeling a bit blue and cheesed off with the world. It was because of feeling like that on a long term basis that I sought help. My first port of call was my doctor (GP) and she had a nice chat with me before she told me that I was depressed!  It wasn’t much of a surprise I had known for a while that I wasn’t feeling ‘right’. She prescribed an antidepressant tablets and guess what? They actually work. After a couple of months of feeling better I stopped taking them, have another guess as to what happened, yep I started feeling depressed again. I have decided that they are alright and now recon they are the best two tablets I take each day.

I have no simple answers to depression I just know how I have got over mine, and even now I still get off days. What I would urge anybody to do is seek professional advice. GP’s are busy people but they are marvellous people who really want to do the best for you. So even in these strange lockdown times they are available for help, so book an appointment, it may be a telephone consultation but it will be a fantastic one. Do it now!

Big Garden Birdwatch for RSPB

 I am in the middle of my RSPB Big Garden Birdwatch camera to hand cuppa tea en route and even a sandwich. All this while sitting in my wheelchair looking out of the window. I watch our garden birds on the feeders most days so sitting still is no hardship. the youtube clip is from last year

   

The second day of lockdown my true love said to me

 “Do you want fish n chips”? Stupid question I always want fish n chips! As days go today was going from bad to worse and it wasn’t even lunch time. The veg box had been delivered the postman had been and the lift repair man was at the door. I had just got out of the shower and waiting to be dressed and Heather to hoist me into my wheelchair. I had thought today was Saturday but even Alexa knew it was only Friday so  that added to my confusion and despair, I wasn’t having a good day. It’s now mid afternoon and we have had our fish and chips with curry sauce, Heather went to Palm Bay Fish Bar read my Trip Advisor review here Cod and chips with curry sauce 😊👍.

I keep a journal 📔 most days I don’t write anything but I wrote Saturday as today’s date in today’s entry twice and as I said it is only Friday. The problem being now I am actually living through the day I thought I had lost. I don’t want to live in through this day but having thought it was gone I am slightly disappointed . My mind is elsewhere  and I’m not sure where it is.  Now to add to the problem I’m not sure That missing a day is a problem at all. I have just discovered voice dictation so this blog is mainly being written by voice and that in its self is Bizarre. When I was a boy even thought about typing by speech I would’ve been regarded as the Deranged. Buck Rogers was talking to Martians And firing laser guns I was flying around the space but now but now science fiction is every day life. 

The day I have lived through (Friday) has included a visit for the lift engineers.He came to fix an ongoing Fault with the door, he never fixed it But actually discovered what the fault is so has ordered some parts. We have had two orders delivered one by post and one by courier and also the veg box arrived from Nash Farm. Our fruit bowl  floweth over with apples and oranges 🍊 grapes 🍇 and grapefruit! And the fridge is full with vegetables 🌶 I can see Heather making more vegetable soup 🍜. One good thing that has happened today is ordering stuff on Amazon. Christmas presents to be posted And even a book for myself.  I’m getting better at this dictation I want to find it bizarre. So I apologise if this post is slightly disjointed but this could be the way forward.

Another small thing but a huge leap for Disabled Don

It may seem insignificant and trivial but today's milestone was going out to eat a McDonald's! I can say that I accomplished this goal in my recovery this full honours and a small feather in my cap! We went out sometime after eleven thirty and drove to the drive through in Minster. Heather and I have a fear 😱 yes fear of drive throughs and we always park up and people watch! So we were tucked safely away in the corner close to both bins and exit and off she toddled in search of food!! I sat in the back wheelchair lashed down and two seatbelts on and Set about people watching! Now our car is really a converted van with rear access ramp to enable me to travel in my wheelchair ♿ the rear Windows are blacked out! Not Gangsta style but dark enough for me to go un-noticed. Perfect for looking out at the outside world. I have been perfecting people watching for over forty years and scanning with blacked out Windows is really as good as it gets! It all started on our first holiday away with friends when our kids were in prams! And as our holidays have progressed the art has been honed! You would be surprised the amount of tents caravans and motor homes I have been guided round by proud owners. 😄 Now I'm my dotage I am unable to be getting in and out of people's home from home so I spy on them eating their food in the car in McDonalds car park! You should see what some people eat and how many drive off discarding wrappers out of the window rather than walk ten feet to put their rubbish in the bin! I must say that today's people used the bin a lot as it was full to the brim. Several people pushed it down but on cheeky crow managed to grab a bag of rubbish fly up to about fifty feet and drop to get the contents scattered all over the road! It then proceeds to pick over the debris and eat the reward of his ingenuity! I have seen Gulls do similar with sea shells to get the contents of the clam or cockle but McDonald's bags that's a real skill! That's been my day. Two weeks after surgery I successfully completed a trip to McD and stayed awake until now. Time for shut eye me thinks and dreams about dare devil Crows risking life and wing to get a meal! Night night 🌙 I am extremely tired.😴

Kate Bradbury the Wildlife Gardener

I have just finished this wonderful book. Gardening for wildlife is one of life's joys. Seeing birds visit your bird table or watching them flit to handle from feeders is for me better watching than most things on the television. Personally I have been a bird watcher from an early age and still remember receiving a copy of the Observer book of Birds at around age of seven and I had a vast array of wildlife books around that time from aunts and uncles. Now at the tender age of 62 I still  enjoy watching birds and although I cannot get into our garden anymore (wheelchairs don't negotiate steps) I give the odd direction to the wife. We both like to see nature flourishing and Kate Bradbury has written this wonderful book to help and encourage even the most timorous of gardeners.
The photographs are excellent and are all in glorious colour. The text is written for the beginner as well as the expert. The cover has a quote from Alan Tichmarsh describing it as "a joyous book" which is praise indeed.

I recently also read The Bumblebee Flies Anyway: A Year of Gardening and wildlife also written by Kate Bradbury. So if you really want a wildlife fest go get a copy or do as I did and order it from  your local Library. Kate is a good writer and draws you into her wild(life) world. She writes for several publications Gardeners world Magazine (BBC)  the Sunday Times The Guardian RHS Magazine and many others,